NBA Pick'Em 05/01: Playoffs

Thanks for tuning in with your eyes and mind to NBA Pick'Em. The playoffs are a two-headed beast. One head eats the other. I think that's how that goes. Maybe I should research that properly and use it for a IED column? 

April Yesterday (30th), 2017 Picks: 

Wizards @ Celtics, pick Celtics, WON
Jazz @ Clippers, pick Jazz, WON

Yesterday's Record: 2-0
Playoff Record: 33-12

May Today (1st), 2017 Picks: 

Toronto Raptors @ Cleveland Cavaliers

This is the tale of two cities. One city is called St. Petersburg and is old and hardened by cold winters. That city represents the Cavaliers. Then there is a new city called Leningrad, an upstart with a lot of spunk. That city was the Bucks. If the Raptors were a threat, it should have been able to beat Leningrad handily. Instead, they stumbled. Well, the trick here is that Leningrad is also Petrograd. I don't know what that has to do with anything, but now the city is called Stalingrad. Wait, that's actually a different city. The city we've been talking about is actually called St. Petersburg again, the original terror of the winter. And even though, it's spring, the Cavs won't back down. 
Pick: Cavaliers

Houston Rockets @ San Antonio Spurs

Game 1s are hard. Maybe the Spurs win. Maybe the Rockets win. I know, I'll look at their regular season head-to-heads. Ah, fuck my life. They've only played one game since Williams joined the Rockets and half their matchups were played before November 13th. Let's see, grab the ol' reliable coin out the pocket. Annnnnd, Spurs secure home-court in Game 1. 
Pick: Spurs