Monday 11/16 NBA Recap
Mavericks 92-76ers 86
The 76ers have successfully not won a game this year, which fits right into their rebuilding strategy. I have done everyone the favor of already coming up with their 2015 tanking campaign name: “hibernate in the den for ben.” Meanwhile, Dallas might actually be a playoff team. Good on you Big-D! BUT YOU’LL NEVER WIN THE TITLE WITH D LIKE THIS. AND THIS!?
Bulls 96-Pacers 95
Sometimes the NBA is a game of inches, or maybe I’m getting that confused with Robert De Niro, or maybe I’m getting that confused with Football. The point (argument) is that sometimes only a point (unit of measure) is the difference between winning and losing. In this situation, the point (in time) that this game was lost was when Jimmy Butler blocked Paul George. Just think, Paul, if your team had prevented this one little in-yo-face Butler alley-oop, you’d have definitely won!
Celtics 111-Rockets 95
Houston, we have a “Houston, we have a problem” joke! The Rockets are not taking off. I think Daryl Morey needs to be replaced by Elon Musk. Come on, Elon, the Red Planet can wait. Please focus your genius on the players in Red Uniforms. Speaking of space, check out this possession by the Celtics. Ball movement, I am not worthy! And the Celtics should keep their 1st rounders if they can keep making Smart picks. Seriously, does Marcus Smart have family out there?
Grizzlies 122-Byproducts of Coffee Evil 114
Brace yourselves, I’m serious, buckle down the hatches and open a can of beans. The thUNDER-whelming roster in OKC lost again without KD. To the Grizzlies of Memphis. Now, don’t you think that it was unfair to expect a Coffee-demon win since they played yesterday, because so did the Grizzlies! If you’ve noticed that the Grizzlies are playing better since the Mario Chalmer’s trade, you are not alone (my friend), so does redditor /u/_jackhoney. He made the great point that the Grizzlies are into some tasty bee-juice with Chalmers.
Spurs 93- Trail Blazers 80
You ever see a cat play with a mouse. The fear and panic evident in the mouse’s eyes as it fails to escape time and time again is palpable. A couple of times you think the mouse will taste freedom when the cat is distracted, but it’s short lived as the cat quickly gets into form and knocks it back with a swipe of its paw. It’s sad and you wonder what sort of creature the cat really is—just kill the thing! Kill it and move on! That was this game. A scant one-possession game, and Boris Diaw decides to do this. The spurs didn’t even have to play defense! Leonard throwing it down like he owns the place… please… your salary of only millions of dollars a year can’t afford a place like the AT&T Center!
Suns 120- Lakers 101
Obviously, if Kobe has played, I wouldn’t be writing things like ‘Bledsoe and Knight combine for 51 points’ or ‘Bledsoe makes Huertas question his existence.’ Can someone, preferably a German doctor, make Kobe young again?